Act As If You Were Lovable

Act As If You Were Lovable

Hi everyone. I’m Cathy Vartuli from http://www.TheIntimacyDojo.com and today we’re talking about loving yourself. We get people all the time saying how they want to improve how they feel about themselves or self-esteem. How they come to relate to other people and court to that is how much you care for yourself.

When you see someone walking down the street as if they are lovable and deserving, good things should come to them. It’s naturally attractive. People want to be around someone like that, but how do you get there when you’re in a place where you feel like you’re not lovable? That there’s something wrong with you? There’s a fundamental flaw and emptiness inside you. You’re really hoping you’ll find that perfect person that will fill you up and make things all better. We all want that. I don’t think it always happens that way.

Sometimes when we first fall in love we feel really filled up. We have all the dopamine running through our system, oxytocin, we’re happy. We do feel better for a while. We’re kind of on a drug high that our own system made. The truth is, those empty spots that are inside of us, they’re still there. Just kind of waiting for the first fight or for some of that high to level up a bit.

When we start loving ourselves, not only do we get that beautiful confidence when we walk down the street, but when there is a blip on our relationship, we don’t have that horrible achy desperate feeling. We may miss the person horribly, we may feel bad about it, but it’s not like we’ve lost ourselves.

So, if you’d like to love yourself more, I have a very simple trick. You may not feel like you’re lovable. You may not feel like you deserve it. But what if you acted as if? I encourage you tomorrow morning when you wake up to…  when you’re making breakfast or just moving about your day, ask yourself, if I love myself, if I deserve love, how would  treat myself? And then see what you do. Just practice that a few times a day and you might start finding yourself more lovable, just because you’re treating yourself that way and you feel better.

I’d love to have your comments, let me know what you think about that. Let me know what comes up. Is it okay to treat yourself as if you were lovable? Is it alright for other people to see you doing that? How do they treat you when you start doing that? Start acting as if you’re valuable. I’d love to hear what you think. Thank you.

 

More articles on improving your communication and relationship skills:

What Do I Do When I Don’t Deserve Happiness and Love?

Learn Love Languages and Create More Intimacy

By | 2016-09-23T15:00:04+00:00 April 2, 2017|Body Image, Dating, Energy, Flirting, Relationship Skills, Sex Geeks, Shame|