Stuck In The Friend Zone

Cathy: Some people end up being friends with everyone they're interested with romantically. It doesn't ever quite transition to romantic. They end up being buddies. That can be really frustrating. Reid: The friend zone. Cathy: Yes. It can be very frustrating.  What would you do, Reid Mihalko, from Reid: I don't know, Cathy Vartuli from What would I do? What a weird segue. Being stuck in the friend zone. [...]

By | 2016-01-06T09:51:24+00:00 August 18, 2014|Dating, Flirting|

Digging Deeping In Your Relationship

Cathy: Have you found that your relationship might be a little stagnant? Or that you're not growing as fast as you would like? Reid: What? I thought everything was fine. What are you telling me? Cathy: Actually, digging into some of the deeper stuff in your relationship, having the conversations that you don't normally have, can help you both grow. It can also deepen your relationship. Reid: That sounds scary. Cathy: It is, sometimes. [...]

By | 2016-01-06T09:56:10+00:00 August 7, 2014|Dating, Relationship Skills|

Cathy on Tuning

Reid: Hi this is Reid Mihalko from Cathy: Cathy Vartuli from Reid: You use this phrase "tuning" to somebody. Please explain for our viewers. Your esoteric languaging. Cathy: Yes, OK. Well, there's two levels you can do that at: 1) you can communicate with your partner and understand what ... you have them explain verbally what they would like to do. Reid: Mm-hmm. Cathy: What turns them on, what stimulates them. And so you [...]

By | 2016-01-06T10:07:34+00:00 August 4, 2014|Flirting, Relationship Skills|

Being Attracted To Unavailable and Distant People

Cathy: Do you ever find that you're getting attracted, you find yourself attracted to people that are distant or emotionally unavailable? That can be a pattern that some people can fond to. And if you can just hit them upside the head it would make you feel better. Reid: Yeah, just do that. Next video please. Cathy: This is Reid Mihalko from Reid: Cathy Vartuli from Cathy: Reid, what can someone do [...]

By | 2016-01-06T08:27:59+00:00 August 1, 2014|Dating, Flirting|

How Can You Tease and Build Anticipation?

Would you like to be better at teasing and building anticipation? It can make everything from flirting to marketing more fun! Reid Mihalko from and Cathy Vartuli from share. Cathy:  Would you like to be better at teasing and building anticipation? Reid:  Hm? What? Yes. Yes! I want to be better at that. Cathy:  This is Reid Mihalko from Reid:  And this is Cathy Vartuli from Cathy:  [...]

By | 2016-01-06T07:56:59+00:00 July 14, 2014|Dating, Flirting, Relationship Skills, Touch|

Finding Ways To Flirt When You’re Shy

Flirting can be fun and playful...but if you're shy, it can feel impossible! Reid Mihalko from and Cathy Vartuli from share how to flirt when you're shy! Cathy: We've done a video on flirting before but I've noticed that ... Reid: No we didn't. Cathy: Yes we did. Reid: No we didn't. Oh I touched your boob. Cathy: My problem is I get very shy when I'm flirting with someone I actually [...]

By | 2016-01-19T13:10:27+00:00 July 10, 2014|Dating, Relationship Skills|

Dealing with Arousal: Enjoying Being Turned On

Arousal can be uncomfortable and embarrassing. Most of us haven't been taught to enjoy it, or how to deal with it. Join Reid Mihalko from and Cathy Vartuli from as they discuss enjoying arousal. Cathy: Hi everyone. I'm Cathy Vartuli from This is Reid Mihalko from Reid: What are we talking about today? Cathy: We're talking about arousal and dealing with it. A lot of us are afraid [...]

By | 2016-01-05T07:35:46+00:00 July 6, 2014|Dating, Flirting|

The Cleavage Dilemma

Have you ever had someone stare at your cleavage? Or have you had trouble tearing your eyes away from someone's boobs? Join Reid Mihalko from and Cathy Vartuli from as they discuss The Cleavage Dilemma! Reid:  Hi, I'm Reid Mihalko from and this is Cathy Vartuli from  Today we're going to talk about cleavage. Cathy: [Laughs]. Reid:  Actually, I'm bringing the camera down because I want to show off [...]

By | 2016-01-07T09:34:45+00:00 June 26, 2014|Body Image, Dating, Flirting|

Does This Panel Make Me Look Fat: Body Image and Sexuality Live from CatalystCon East!

Size and body image can have profound and sometimes debilitating effects on a person's sexual self-esteem and self-expression. Internalized shame and feelings of inadequacy are often super-charged by the constant stream of external judgment, a barrage of media and marketing pressure (individuals are exposed to an estimated 300,000 negative images or comments about weight each year), and socially acceptable prejudice against those who don't conform. People of size can be [...]

By | 2016-01-05T10:44:54+00:00 May 27, 2014|Body Image, Collaborators|

Where Sex Meets “Isms”: From Shame to Self-Expression

This panel was presented at the 2013 Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit in DC, by emotional freedom coach Cathy Vartuli  from, 2013 EXXXOTICA BBW Female Performer of the Year Kelly Shibari from, iconic transgender filmmaker Buck Angel, sensuality guru Elle "Lady Cheeky" Chase from and, and outspoken sex blogger N'Jaila Rhee from Each person's sexual self-expression is unique, and requires courage and self-knowledge to [...]

By | 2016-01-19T13:53:27+00:00 November 27, 2013|Collaborators|